Wednesday, April 1, 2009

I am cranky.

So, I have been a little cranky this week. I have pondered the reasons for this and cannot really attribute it to one particular thing. I guess there are lots of little things that have all snowballed. I miss my friends a lot. I miss seeing and talking to people that really know me. I miss sharing life with them. Thank goodness for internet and for Vonage (when they work) but it is just not the same as being there. Not to mention that there are just not enough hours in the day to keep in touch like I want to. Since we have to walk everywhere, things just take about 10 times longer than they used to. As I have reminded myself at least a million times the past few months, this is a new normal and I have to adjust to it. It takes time. I have to tell you that I do not like it some days....at all.
Last week I spent a morning at home instead of going to school. I had been sick all weekend and wanted to make sure that I was better before heading back. I loved being at home so much! I really miss being at home and being able to just take care of my family and my home. I am SO grateful to have Regina to help me since there is no way that I could go to school and take care of the house and family. However, I don't want some one else to be doing these things! I want to do them. Ugh, I really do not feel a strong bonding in my heart with going to school full time. Again, don't get me wrong, I am so blessed to be able to attend such a great school and I know that this place is where God has me at this time. I am just saying again....I don't always like it.
So, thanks for letting me be real and honest tonight. I will try to be in a better mood next time I blog. :)

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6 comments:

David Pope said...

Understandable! God will provide!

Anonymous said...

Tina,
While I have not made the leap of faith you have, I understand a little
of what you are feeling. Going back to school for me has also been a challenge. While I have no doubt that God has unfolded this plan before me, I have really missed being at home and being a wife and mom. (And my children are almost grown!!) I am like you, I take that role seriously and have absolutely loved it. As seasons change in our lives,God is faithful to equip us to do whatever He calls us to do. Of course, I have no idea of the difficulty of packing up and leaving my home and friends,moving to a foreign land, and learning a new language. Thank you for sharing your heart, Tina. I continue to lift you in prayer. I love you and I am so proud of your obedience to God's call in your life.

Love,
Amy

Katie said...

Tina,
You are a Mom...as moms we feel we are to take care of everything....you are just normal!!!!Love you!

Adam and Jess said...

hey cranky pants :)
i tried to think of something funny to write on your facebook to inspire you - but nothing came :) I totally understand how you feel (not that it helps any!) Being in limbo really sucks...i just am sitting here in Lima...doing nothing really!? Just eating and spending money....good times.
But here is something that should make you feel better, are you ready!? Ok: there is a 95% chance that tomorrow morning Adam and I will get in a truck and drive to Pulcallpa (thats a 2 day drive) then we will put all of Jeremy and Susan's stuff and ours on a boat/launcha (like a barge) and we will ride with it up the river to Iquitos for 7 DAYS. This boat holds 300 people....there are 3 bathrooms and we will all be in the same room....sleeping in HAMMOCKS!!
See, I told you that you would feel better :)
love you!
jess

Bethany said...

Quit whining! :) That was fun to type. LOL

You are right where you are supposed to be...

keumele said...

Tina-
I know you are in a totally new culture and that makes it 10 times harder, but when Michael and I first moved up here to North GA from all of our family and everything I know I felt the EXACT same way you do! I didn't like it, and there are some days I still don't like it! It does get better though! It has for me!! I can see God working and I know he is working in yours and Tim's lives. You have taken a huge leap of faith and for that I applaud you, it's hard! Good luck and God bless you!!